Sudden Change in Plans

Yesterday, I was supposed to leave on vacation with Jan and six of our kids. We had been planning this vacation for a long time. The eight of us were going to visit family in Tennessee, Mammoth Cave, the Memphis Zoo, the Laura Ingalls Wilder Museum, and the St. Louis Arch. Not only were our plans set, but we were actually packed two days before departure (a miraculous proof that this vacation must be of God, right?). But the evening before departure, a cardiologist dared to mess with my plans. So yesterday, instead of heading down the highway, I was wheeled down a hospital corridor for a heart catheterization.

My symptoms, to me, seemed mild enough -- no big deal really. But they were of enough concern to several medical professionals, my wife, and my kids to warrant postponing the family vacation. It was quite a bummer for me, so I can only imagine how it might seem to a six-year-old. But it was also a no-brainer. For me to disregard the concerns of so many about visible symptoms and proceed full-steam-ahead with the plans I’ve been so excited about for so long would be…well, foolish, short-sighted, and blatantly self-centered. Yes, it’s my life...my heart...my decision. But my decision affects many others in a profound and lasting way. It's not just about me and my dreams.

I confess, however, that as I listened to the cardiologist and my wife urging me to cancel my plans and go with the heart cath, I felt numb. My mind raced as to how I could still make it work. Inwardly, I felt sour, sullen, mopey. This trip had been planned so carefully, and the details fell into place so perfectly. The thought flashed through my mind to thank my doctor for his well-intentioned opinion, then go out and find another who would tell me what I wanted to hear -- that I could still proceed with my plans and deal with my symptoms after my trip.

But no. Love forbade me. Why would I stubbornly and recklessly plunge ahead, ignoring the truth that others can clearly see? Why put my family's future at risk? I can always pursue my plan later if the procedure shows me to be healthy enough. And deep down inside, I know that the people who care most about me...people who care enough to sound the alarm...people who would dare to mess with my plans...are the ones I can trust the most. By listening and heeding their concerns, I can improve my chances of having a lifetime of healthier vacations down the road.

By the way, the doctor was right. They found four blockages, three of them in the main artery to my heart. One was 90% blocked. And there are some complications. I'll hear today what it means (possibly by-pass surgery). I'm glad I found out now rather than at the bottom of Mammoth Cave.

It really never hurts to slow down and listen.